I see the Lord's potential.
The craziness. You know. Me. Me being crazy. I always am in this state of wonderment at the crazy ideas that flow through my head. They almost make it hard to listen to life happening sometimes.
And frustration. Ohhhh being frustrated. I spent 80% of my life in some sort of frustration over someone (hello! me! this girl! right here!) not seeing the bigger picture. Over inefficiency, over not dreaming big enough...but when it really comes down to it, I think God made me crazy because I'm just passionate enough to plant His big ideas and big dreams in the minds of others. And just dumb enough to go after the ones no one else wants to grab hold of.
God made me a believer in potential.
The first time we meet, I listen and observe. I learn more about a person in 5 minutes of watching than hours of talking. And it's in those 5 minutes that I see potential for this or that. And strengths of this sort that could lead to an ease of completing this sort of something or that sort of goodness. And this I could learn from you and that thing that you do so well that I want to hear more about. And this thing I just have to hear about in your life (my adoptive families - this sound familiar?!)
I think I spend time frustrated because God wants it that way. He wants my head spinning when I miss the mark. When I don't dream big enough. When I spend one minute not pushing with the full force I was made to push with. I might roll out of a meeting kicking and screaming, but it's because I love for us to come together and love folks. To serve. To raise money. To shoot in the prettiest light. To get as many free toothbrushes from coupons as possible, so that kids can brush their teeth. To have one more thing donated to the carnival. To pass out popsicles in 100 degree weather. To sell just one more adoption t-shirt to someone who was just bashing adoption last week. I want to do what the Lord wants. I want to be crazy. And I want to be frustrated. But only if it means we're moving in the right direction in this crazy life. God's real crazy. But I'm learning (very, very slowly) to be just crazy enough to just listen to Him.
It's worked out well so far. More than well. My cup overflows the minute I start to listen.
That's all I've got.
Trying to listen to the crazy and remember it's God showing me potential. It's God giving me vision. Just trying to balance it between good and getting me in trouble.
***And sorry for the sorta lame picture. I didn't have much on my phone that fit with this. However, I love this one-and-only picture I have from the Dorman Center Carnival. Those are some folks who took a vision and ran with it - look at them hanging up an American flag and being all cute. I never would have thought to hang that thing up on the goal posts and that's just what they were doing when I pulled up. I was all balloons and streamers and they were all lets hang a flag to honor our military/fire/police folks coming to give their time. Duh. Thanks for being smarter and more visionary than me, Carnival crew. Perfect example of the more-the-marrier makes the vision come alive. Love those folks.